I’ve been feeling like punching folks.
With my thumb tucked neatly inside my palm and my fingers curled around it. As solid of a girl punch as I know how to do or that I’ve thrown.
I haven’t of course but that hasn’t stopped me from thinking about doing it or wanting to do it.
It’s either that or my arch-nemesis – food.
Either way feels like a lose-lose proposition.
I have a beach party that I’m supposed to be going to today but I don’t have the $20.00 entrance fee to get in on all the food I won’t be able to eat and the booze I no longer have a thirst for. But White Chocolate Raspberry Truffle ice cream is $3.48 a pint and I can afford that a lot more than any bail money I would have to pony up to get me out of jail.
Why the sudden (albeit not so much) rage-fest?
July is notoriously a bad month for me. It is the month that my Mother passed. She was put in hospice around the 7th and died on the tenth or eleventh. We buried her on the 21st. My Self hasn’t forgotten, no matter how many years (17 yrs to be exact) have passed or how much life has happened. I still feel like it happened recently. You never get over losing a parent, especially not when you just turn 21. Happy Birthday.
I get antsy and angst-filled and a whole lot of other things that I don’t immediately realize until someone remarks how out of character I am or have been. And wanting to punch people is definitely out of character for me.
And so, I will polish off that half pint of ice cream in the fridge, I will keep my hands to myself and I will miss her.
I Love you Mom…